As 2016 comes to a close I wanted to reflect on the year and share with you the lessons I have learnt or have been taught this year. No names are mentioned just my embarrassing or liberating experiences.
1) Never wear a bikini to an aqua Zumba class
If you are a friend or follower on my other social media links you’ll know about my mishap in an aqua aerobics class back in the Summer. Let us just say the instructor saw more than just cleavage, he got a full cup slip. I was mortified but I think the instructor may have been happier than usual seeing as I was the youngest pupil in the class. Moral of the story, wear a very fitted and bust hugging swimming costume.
2) Aim for the Lips
How could I forget kissing a male individual on the nose because my friends haven’t let me down on the amusing moment. I too, am also rather embarrassed that my finest lipstick went away on a nose instead of a set of lips. I blame adrenaline but also drinking more alcohol than usual to calm my nerves.
3) I don’t like being left on read
I have started to use the WhatsApp messenger service a whole lot more the last year and with it’s rather handy feature of seeing if the person has received and read the text you will always know if the person is ignoring you. This year I have learnt that I become incredibly annoyed if people read my text and then do not reply to the text having read the text. Perhaps I should stick to normal text where my gut instinct tells me if the person is ignoring me rather than an irritating blue tick telling me such an update.
4) I need a career in private investigating
We’re on our own now so confess now to yourself if you too are guilty of this. Social media stalking. I bet you are? Whether you admit it or deny it, you can’t deny stalking your potential ‘bae’ or a friend’s other friends or can you? It gets to 2013 of the person’s timeline and you realise you’ve gone too far or you double tap on Instagram and like a picture of theirs from 2012. Has that happened to you to? This year I have realised and have been told by friends and family that I am rather good and that if my career path after Uni does not succeed I need to venture into private investigating. I will just say that some people leave their social media open to stalking and I just take advantage of that.
5) My Body dislikes Wholewheat
On several occasions I have mentioned my gluten intolerance and how I live a mainly gluten free lifestyle. I have learnt this year that my body particularly dislikes wholewheat, the wheat that is found in wholemeal pasta, rice and bread. This irritates me much worse than white carbs therefore lesson in that category avoid all brown breads especially before a night out at the pub.
6) Individuals won’t text or speak to you but ‘like’ and ‘favourite’ your social media posts
This year I have met, befriended and become acquaintances with lots of people through blogging, university and work which I am very grateful for. Some of these people are great whilst others have taught me this lesson which is, is that they shall ‘like’ your selfie or outfit post on social media but will not utter a word to you in person. Sound familiar? Lesson taught, just slay in the looks department all the time and let them just admire you on social media and continue to be spineless.
7) 8,000 words is a lot of words
Whether you’re preparing to write a dissertation in the new year or have already written one you know where I am coming from. When I signed up to write my research project for undergraduate study in female oppression through colonial space I did not realise or understand the enormity of the challenge. I spent 4 months researching, writing and drafting those words and now I wait on an examiner to tell me whether those words are enough for a nice grade. It has given me an eye opener into perhaps post graduate work and whether I actually want to venture down that path, perhaps I still do but perhaps I don’t. I will decide after I get the grade because if I get less than a 2:1 I will expect a refund for many words my fingers typed over the writing period.
8) Reversing into a lamp post will scratch and dent a Fiat 500
I have never been great at reversing even my driving instructor could back me up on that and the 5 examiners I had for test. Since driving I have got better which was a lie when I found myself standing next to my beloved Fiat 500 twin air sport with a dented side cheek having accidentally reversed it into a lamp post. Moral of the story, go for the extra of reversing censors on the next car.
9) Saying Yes
I was listening to Snow Patrol the other day and I heard a track of their’s that I haven’t heard in ages and it was like a euphoric moment that was summing up the lesson I have learnt this year. I have done things that which perhaps last year and the year before I wouldn’t have done. This year therefore has been the year of me saying yes to things and going for them.
10) If you feel good share it
If you follow my Instagram or Twitter you know that I post selfies on regular occasions mainly when I am heading out. If I am feeling sassy or I feel that my outfit or make up is rocking that particular day I believe that it is my right to share that with you guys. I have spent a long time being unhappy with my appearance and so if suddenly my eyeliner has fleeked to perfection or my lip liner is as good as Kylie Jenner’s I will share that. If you don’t like it then I honestly believe that you cannot handle the sass. Why not share if you’re feeling good with your appearance?
11) Beyonce’s Lemonade is liberating
When Beyonce wrote the Lemonade album she must have known that she was writing a masterpiece for women across the world. This album has been mine and my friends album for liberating ourselves in front of the opposite sex. I have learnt this year that if you’re having a bad day whether its University or life related, 9/10 Beyonce is the answer because her sass levels on this album are just out of this world and will 100% guarantee you a sass boost.
12) Spinning is an anger buster
In the Summer I took up Spinning having given into pressure from my best friend who was addicted to it. Years of being too scared to do it I plucked up the courage and just went for it and since then I try to go twice a week and use it once a week to bust out some stress or anger and I have to say it works wonders. As well as working wonders on my buttocks it is also great for taking out my anger on those 8,000 words on the pedals.
13) Early Spinster-Hood is A-OK
Although friends and family have spent most of this year trying to set me up with new fellas none have worked or gone anywhere. Partly due to my high standards and secondly because I am too sassy to handle. But this year has taught me that I like my own company, yes the relationship perks would be nice but I like being my own person. Going out when I want to, buying things for me and enjoying a Nicki Minaj slut drop with no shame.
14) Be You
Although my friends and family love me for me, my family often suggest I should tame my confidence and sass down. Some family members think that these factors put the opposite sex off. I think it has something to do with they would prefer an easy girl whilst I consider myself a challenge. They often say they wished I liked more nude shades of lipstick than reds and berry tones. I just want to say that this year I have learnt that I will be me. I will wear red lipstick with a brown smokey eye, I will post three photos on Instagram and I will certainly re tweet as many posts about The Grand Tour with no shame or worry about what people think.
What has 2016 taught you?